Passion with Process

October 9, 2018

For everything great we will ever accomplish in life, I believe there must be a process we must endure to arrive at the destination of success. When looking at my very existence, I can trace it back to a relationship between two people (my parents) that went through a process that led to my reproduction. Then my entered the process of childhood, adolescence, puberty and various stages of adulthood, and that process led me to my current stage of adulthood. 

As I reflect on my path of education and the process from pre-k to kindergarten, elementary, middle and high school, then college, as well as the path with my career from apprentice to leading my own ensembles, each has been a process. 

However, it seems that I still manage to get frustrated  when my life hits a stage of the process that is incredibly uncomfortable. But what I have had to lean is that I don’t have to be frustrated because where I am is merely just a stage of the process. To live is to constantly be in a process towards my goals and desires in life. 

I heard something recently about maintaining passion in the midst of the process, and I think passion is a great measuring tool towards maintaining motivation towards getting through the process. 

I find that when I am no longer passionate and motivated, I simply can’t find the strength to keep going. 

My passion comes from staying connected to my “Why.” Why am I doing this? Why is this person in my life? Why does this matter to me?

Choosing to live in touch with my answers and making sure those answers are truly mine and not others, makes my passion real and authentic. 

It is my desire to not love every part of the process but to stay committed to it, which challenges all the real emotions about the matter. It’s so funny to me because it’s so easy to start a journey, but so difficult to finish it. I feel so much of marketing, and the advertising world is about getting all of us to begin something, but you rarely will see an ad about the middle of a process. I feel that character is truly developed and confirmed in the midst of an uncomfortable part of our life. 

It is my deep desire that whatever process that I am greeted with that I maintain the right attitude about Why, because that contributes to my core, and everything in life stems from there which I feel is the root of our emotional and philosophical lives. 

I also hope to work hard to remain passionate about my , “Why,” so I can always positively determine what I am purposed to do in this life.

A Leap of Faith

September 21, 2018 

“Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen.”- Hebrews 11:1

When I think of the subject of faith in my life and what it is to have faith, it has been the very core of my existence and everything connected to it. I am so thankful to have been raised in a household that was centered around having faith to move the mountains of our life’s challenges, and having integrity walk us down the various roads in life. 

However, the concept and context of faith has changed so much from year to year from me, including depending on how much I am living and trust God in this life. 

As a child, I had faith in what my parents told me, trusting in their wisdom, and knowing what they suggested was in my best interest. 

As a teenager, I began to have faith in my dreams, and seeking after what my heart desired via music, and otherwise. But to be honest, I was bright eyed bushy tailed, and didn’t really have the concept or context of what faith is by my own definition. 

I remember my father saying to me when I got ready to apply for college, “Son, you need to go to the military (Marine Corps., who was scouting me at the time,) and that way they will pay for your college and you’ll get health benefits and a salary.” I told my father I wasn’t interested in that kind of stability, I wanted to learn and study art at the highest level with peers that would challenge me to no end. One of the biggest acts of faith for me was to only apply to three colleges because I honestly knew that I was destined to go to Juilliard. 

When my faith kicks in, and I have an inkling of the direction I am supposed to go in, I pray, fasten my emotional seatbelt, and hold onto what I feel so deeply internally. Nothing can deter me. 

Activating my faith for me is such an inner battle, because my will tells me to keep going, but sometimes reality paints a whole new picture that makes me want to doubt. For me, taking that leap is really a motion towards holding fast to my gut instinct, and I am so thankful to be able to discern what is that inner-yearning and guide, and what is just emotional. 

A challenge, I feel, is to consistently take that leap, when I am afraid of falling, but faith requires action consistently. 

As life can sometimes knock me around here and there, I get a little gun shy, and even fearful questioning, “What if it doesn’t work out this time?”

I then look to the right and left, and I take that huge leap, knowing that living by faith is much more impactful than living without it.